原文转自《Harvard Business Review》，网址：https://hbr.org/2023/03/shifting-your-perception-after-being-laid-off
今年7月，我经历了人生中第一次裁员。突如其来的变故让我感到十分委屈和无助。生活仿佛被按下了暂停键，而房贷和日常开支的压力却从未停歇，依然一天天累积着。在随后几个月的求职期间，我把主要精力放在了陪伴家人、好好生活上。非常感谢我的家人在这段艰难时期给予我的理解、包容和支持，是他们让我度过了这段低谷。好在，上个月我找到了新工作——不仅单位更好，职位更高，薪资也有所提升。经过一个月的适应和磨合，我已经完全融入了新的工作环境。
现在回头看，那段在家待业的时光反而显得格外珍贵。它让我有机会重新审视自己的人生方向，也让我更加珍惜与家人相处的每一刻。再难的事，挺过去回头看，都只是故事。如今生活重新步入正轨，这个账号也会恢复更新频率，与大家分享更多内容。
下面这篇文章来自《哈佛商业评论》，讲的正是如何在被裁员后调整心态。希望能给正在经历类似困境的朋友们带来一些启发和帮助。
by Vivek Gulati and Emma Seppälä
March 16, 2023
On Friday, Jan 20, 2023, I (Vivek) woke up at 5 a.m. I had a 6:30 meeting with a program manager based in France. I scrolled through emails on my Google Pixel Watch (that I was testing) while lying in bed.
2023年1月20日，星期五，早上五点我就醒了。六点半要和一个法国的项目经理开会。我躺在床上，用谷歌的Pixel手表（当时正在测试）查邮件。
There was an email from Sundar Pichai announcing 12,000 layoffs.
Sundar Pichai发了一封邮件，宣布要裁员12000人。
The next email from Google’s People-Ops team said I was one of them.
下一封，谷歌人力部门告诉我，我就是这12000人中的一个。
My adrenaline shot up. I tried logging in to the corporate network, but my sudden lack of access only confirmed that none of this was my imagination.
肾上腺素飙升。我试着登录公司内网，但发现已经没有访问权限了，这才确认我不是在做梦，这一切都是真的。
My first thought was: I have no way of notifying the guy in France. Heck, I didn't even remember his name. I had only had an email exchange with him, but now I didn't have access to that either.
我第一反应是：那个马上要跟我开会的法国人，我通知不到了。操，我连他叫什么都没记住。之前只是邮件联系过，现在连邮件都看不了了。
I was supposed to meet another colleague later in the day to discuss a new project. We had worked very closely for a number of years on a previous team, so I happened to have his cell number. I let him know that I wouldn't make the meeting because I had been laid off. We exchanged a series of thoughtful texts on how to navigate this abrupt news.
当天晚点还要跟另一个同事开会，聊一个新项目。之前在一个团队共事过好几年，关系比较熟，正好有他手机号。我告诉他，我被裁了，会开不成了。我们发了好几条短信，谈了谈怎么应对这个突如其来的变故。
Next, I texted my former manager. I had asked him to be my reference for an internal job transfer just the previous week. Fifteen minutes later, he texted back saying he had been laid off too. He had tried to enter an office building, and his badge didn’t work. It was a rough way to find out.
然后，我给前领导发短信。就在上个星期，我还请他给我做内部转岗的推荐人。十五分钟后，他回复说他也被裁了。他本来要进办公楼，门卡却刷不开。然后他就知道了，这种经历还挺糟心的。
Another colleague told me that he broke down when he realized he was one of the 12,000. It was his first time getting laid off.
另一个同事跟我说，他发现自己是这12000人中的一个时，当场就崩溃了。这是他人生第一次被裁。
Being in the tech industry, I have been laid off on multiple occasions. Each experience taught me something new.
在科技行业干了这么多年，我被裁过好几次了。每次被裁，都能学到点新东西。
As a man, I strongly identified with the responsibility I felt to provide for my family. When I was laid off during the 2008 recession, I was devastated. For four months, I struggled daily with anxiety, sadness, anger, and frustration.
作为男性，我一直觉得养家糊口是自己的责任。2008年经济危机那会儿被裁员，我被打击得都崩溃了。整整四个月，每天都在焦虑、悲伤、愤怒和挫败中挣扎。
I was ashamed to speak to others. I was afraid of being judged. The shame of unemployment is real. And research shows employment has a protective impact on our mental health.
我不好意思跟别人说，害怕被指指点点。失业的羞耻感实实在在。而且研究表明，有工作对我们的心理健康有保护作用。
There was one thing I loved to do above anything else: volunteering to teach meditation. I stopped. I thought that without a job, I was not good enough to do even that.
哪怕我最喜欢做的事：利用业余时间当志愿者，教别人冥想，我也不做了。我觉得，没了工作，我连这个都不配做了。
I suffered silently while my wife patiently stuck with me.
我默默忍受着，而我妻子耐心地陪伴着我。
It was only much later, after a lot of reflection, that I was able to recognize that my thought patterns were destructive and untrue. My job is not a reflection of my worth, and neither is yours. You are not your job or your earning potential. Your worth is intrinsic. The situation that you find yourself in is not a judgment on who you are as a person. And who knows, it might be a transition to something much better. It probably is. And with that in mind, you owe it to yourself to look after yourself first.
很久之后，经过大量的反思，我才意识到，我当时的心态是有害的，也是错误的。我的工作不能代表我的价值，你也一样。你不等于你的工作，也不等于你的赚钱能力。你的价值是与生俱来的。你现在的处境，不代表你是个怎样的人。而且谁知道呢，失业没准是个转折点，能让你找到更好的工作。这很有可能。把这一点记在心里，你更应该先照顾好自己。
I don’t know how long it will be before I land my next gig.
我不知道得多久才能找到下一份工作。
In 2008, it was four long, painful months. Amid everything I felt, the one thing I learned from that experience is the importance of self-care. Here are some ways to focus on yourself when you’re overwhelmed with the news.
2008年那会儿，我找了整整四个月，又漫长又痛苦。经历了那么多，我学到的最重要的一点就是：要照顾好自己。下面就说说，因为被裁员而压得喘不过气的时候，怎么把心思放在自己身上。
For those of us who have family responsibilities, there's a schedule that doesn't stop: kids need to be dropped off at school, picked up, and more. It creates structure that can keep us focused when we become untethered.
我们这些拖家带口的人，生活里有些事是停不下来的：孩子要送去学校，要接回来，还有一堆事儿。这种固定的日常事务能让我们在失去工作这个锚点的时候，不至于完全失去方向。
For others, creating structure needs to be more intentional. It is way too easy to stay up late working on a spreadsheet of job listings, fine-tuning your resume, or binging on Netflix. Try signing up for a class or an event — possibly in-person — whether it’s a skill you’re trying to develop or that CrossFit class that’s been on your New Year’s resolution list. This will create more structure for the coming days by engaging you in activities that build your confidence and capabilities, or that are just for fun.
对于还没结婚成家的人来说，创造这种生活规律就需要多花点心思。熬夜整理求职表格、反复修改简历，或者刷剧刷到停不下来，这些都太轻易陷进去了。不妨报个课程或者活动——最好是线下的——不管是你想学的技能，还是新年计划里一直想去的健身课。这样一来，接下来的日子就有了更多安排，通过参与这些活动来增强自信、提升能力，或者纯粹就是放松娱乐。
Searching for a job is a job in itself. You want to show up for this job at your best — not exhausted.
找工作本身就像份工作。你得拿出最好的状态——千万别垂头丧气、半死不活。
As for me, I meditate daily and do breathing practices. I go to the gym. This is an investment in myself, and the ROI is worth it: I sleep better and am more energized and happier. Breathing exercises can make you more resilient by decreasing anxiety and stress while improving well-being. The data also show that meditation improves focus and concentration as well as improves sleep. Successful CEOs make time for it. Physical exercise also helps with overall health and mental health.
拿我来说，我每天冥想、做呼吸练习。还去健身房锻炼。这些都是对自己的投资，投入产出比很划算：能让我睡得更香，精力更充沛，心情也更愉快。呼吸练习能让人更坚韧不拔，减少焦虑和压力，提升幸福感。数据还表明，冥想能提高专注力，还能改善睡眠。连事业有成的CEO们都会抽时间冥想、做呼吸练习。做一做体育锻炼对身体健康和心理健康也都有好处。
This is one of the things I’ve learned about myself: The moment I start thinking about “What will happen to me? What about me?” my energy goes down, and I start to get depressed. If I can find a way to help someone else, I notice an instant shift in my energy and mood.
我发现自己有一个特点：一旦开始琢磨“我会怎么样？我该怎么办？”这种问题，整个人的能量就变弱了，蔫了，还容易陷入抑郁。但只要能找到办法帮帮别人，我会立马感觉精神状态和心情都好了起来。
If you find yourself down or overwhelmed, take a break, and see if you can help someone else — even if it is just reaching out to someone to ask how they’re doing.
如果你感到心情低沉或者压力山大，不妨休息一下，看看能不能帮帮别人——哪怕只是联系一下，问问对方过得怎么样。
Shifting your focus to “Who can I serve?” can be an almost magical experience. When you’re taking good care of yourself, your cup is full, and you have the energy to engage in service to others. The meaning and joy derived from supporting others is in itself energizing. Research also shows that people who tend to volunteer have not only improved mental health and better physical health, but better chances of finding employment.
In the busyness of life, I lost touch with so many people over the years. As the news of the layoff spread, many of them contacted me to see if I was okay.
生活忙忙碌碌，这些年我跟好多人都失去了联系。裁员的消息一传出去，很多人主动联系我，问我还好吗。
I reached out to a few and it felt so nourishing. I have a WhatsApp chat with my friends from undergrad. When I shared with them that I was looking for a job thanks to the Google layoffs, one of them joked about the kind of odd jobs I could take. I can always count on that set of friends to make a heavy situation lighter and humorous.
我联系了几个朋友，感觉特别暖心。我有个大学同学群。我跟他们说因为谷歌裁员，我正在找工作，其中一个人就开玩笑说我可以去干点什么零工。每次遇到糟心事，这帮朋友总能让气氛轻松起来，逗我开心。
It’s easy to forget that you’re not alone. Over the years, you’ve built relationships and been there for people. In a time when there’s sudden flexibility in your schedule, it’s worth it to renew and revive these relationships. Social connection, the data shows, is key to mental health, physical health, and even longevity.
When faced with a difficult situation, it's normal to point fingers. Either you blame someone else — the CEO, the investors, office politics — or you blame yourself — I should've seen this coming, I missed the signs, maybe I'm not good enough, and so on.
遇到糟心事，找人怪罪是很正常的反应。要么怪别人——怪CEO、怪投资人、怪办公室政治；要么怪自己——我早该看出来的，我怎么没看出征兆，可能是我不够优秀，等等。
It is important to honor the negative emotions that might come up, like anger, frustration, resentment, and fear. Research shows that suppressing them makes things worse. But it is critical not to let them take over.
负面情绪冒出来很正常，比如愤怒、沮丧、怨恨、恐惧，这些情绪都应该被正视。研究表明，压抑负面情绪只有坏处。但关键是别让这些情绪占了上风，冲昏了头脑。
You’re allowed to resent all of the above for the layoff. But you may find that neither self-blame nor blaming others is helpful in the long run. Introspection has value and can help you learn what you can do differently going forward, but beyond that, ruminating is a waste of emotional and mental energy. It is actually impossible to even pinpoint the exact cause of any event; it’s usually a number of things coming together.
你可以对裁员这件事感到愤愤不平。但时间长了你会发现，无论是责怪自己还是责怪别人，都没什么用。反思当然有价值，能帮你想清楚以后该怎么做，但除此之外，反复纠结这件事只会浪费精力和情绪。其实，不管什么事，根本不可能找到确切原因；通常都是好多因素凑到一起才导致的结果。
The only practical question worth asking is not who to blame but rather: "Okay, that happened. Now what? How do I move on?"
真正该问的实际问题，不是该怪谁，而是：“事已至此。染好呢？接下来该怎么办？”
It’s easy to lose trust — in organizations and yourself — when you’re laid off. But that’s often because you can’t see the bigger picture.
被裁员后，很容易对公司和自己都失去信任。但这往往是因为视野局限在当下了。
The first time I got laid off in 2007, I found a job in a niche field one week later. When I got laid off again in the middle of the 2008 disaster, I found a job four months later in that same niche. The pay was better, and the role was better.
2007年我第一次被裁员，一周后就在一个细分领域找到了工作。2008年经济危机期间我又被裁了一次，四个月后还是在那个细分领域找到了新工作。涨了薪，也升了职。
Of course, variability in severance packages and financial instability can make it even harder to see what the future holds. There's uncertainty that can also come from other factors. What if the next job requires a cross-country move and uprooting the entire family — kids, schools, social circles — or more travel and time away from them?
当然了，离职补偿方案各不相同，经济又不稳定，未来会怎样就更难看清了。还有其他因素带来的不确定性。要是下一份工作需要搬到别的地方，举家搬迁——孩子、学校、社交圈子——全都得重新来过，或者需要经常出差，跟家人聚少离多，那可怎么办？
But if it were not for the layoffs, I wouldn't even have widened my horizons to look for something else. I know some people are more agile and proactive about their careers, but I hadn't been. I stuck to my comfort zone. Yet life nudged me to stretch thanks to the layoffs. And it was worth it. Amid a host of unpredictable stressors, cultivate what you can place trust in.
要不是被裁员了，我根本不会想着去换别的工作。我知道有些人对自己的职业发展更主动积极，但我不是。我一直待在舒适区里。结果被裁员这事儿逼着我不得不跳出舒适区。事实证明这是值得的。面对一大堆不确定性，面对压力，你要知道自己信得过什么。
You've faced tough situations, but come out on the other side smarter for it and wiser. This trust, this faith that you've handled challenges in the past, can bring relief and strength. Research on post-traumatic growth suggests that difficult situations can lead to positive changes and learnings.
你以前肯定遇到过难过的坎，但最后都挺过来了，也能吃一堑长一智。相信自己能搞定，知道自己以前解决过难题，这份信心会让你心里踏实不少，也能给你力量。关于创伤后成长的研究表明，困境也能带来积极的改变，让人有所收获。
Research from Stanford University shows that other people want to help. All you have to do is ask, as University of Michigan Professor Wayne Baker has researched and written about.
Reach out to your network. No sooner had the layoffs been announced than I started getting messages from people wanting to help out.
主动联系你的朋友吧。裁员消息一公布，就有人主动发消息说要帮我。
You'll be surprised at how unexpected support can be. The owner of the gym I go to is connecting me to a client of his who works at a software company. He said, "Look, man, I don't know anything about what you guys do, but it might be worth a conversation."
有些帮助，来得让人喜出望外，毫无防备。我常去的健身房老板帮我联系了他的一个客户，那人在一家软件公司工作。他跟我说：“哥们儿，你们干的活我是一窍不通，但聊聊总没坏处。”
In the day-to-day of life, it’s common to get so busy that you forget the bigger context of your life. You forget to ask yourself important questions like “What do I really want?”
日子忙忙碌碌，很容易就忘了自己人生的大方向是什么。会忘记问自己一些重要的问题，比如“我想要的究竟什么？”
In this forced break from work, I'm asking myself what kind of work I want to do next. What role will let me more fully express myself? I'm realizing that sitting behind a computer and writing code is fun, but what actually makes me come alive is interfacing with people. Having only done the individual code contributor role for most of my career, I'm asking myself if maybe it's time for a change.
趁着这段被迫停工的时间，我在想自己接下来想做什么样的工作。什么样的岗位能让我更充分地实现自己？我发现，坐在电脑前写代码确实挺有意思，但真正让我觉得有干劲的，其实是跟人打交道。我职业生涯的大部分时间都单打独斗写代码，现在我在想，是不是该换个方向了。
Perhaps you can do the same. Is it time to revisit a dream that you brushed off earlier in a different field? Do you want your next job to have more work-life balance? What drains you, and what makes you come alive?
你也可以这样想想。是不是该重新捡起以前放下的梦想，换个领域试试？下一份工作，想不想平衡好工作和生活？什么事情让你觉得心累，什么事情又能让你充满干劲？
Understandably, some of us may not have the luxury of time. Loans, mortgages, visa status, and other factors may require us to find a job fairly quickly, even if it is not an ideal gig. Yet, the pause and learning afforded by your current situation can generate fruitful reflections.
当然了，不是所有人都有时间慢慢来。还房贷、还车贷、工签身份，还有其他各种因素，都可能逼着你得尽快找到工作，哪怕不是什么理想的工作。但是呢，眼下停下来的时间，还有当下处境带来的学习机会，也能让你收获不少。
Shifting your perspective of a layoff to see it as an opportunity — for change, for something new, for growth, for learning — requires some effort. And that effort comes easier if you take care of our own emotional and mental well-being in the process.
把裁员看作是个机会——改变的机会、尝试新东西的机会、成长的机会、学习的机会——其实不容易。如果你能照顾好自己的情绪和心理健康，就会容易得多。
单词短语
adrenalin
n. a hormone produced by the body, for example when you are frightened, angry, or excited, that makes the heart beat faster and prepares the body to react to danger 肾上腺素
These arguments always get my adrenalin going (=make me excited or angry).
这些争论总是让我肾上腺素上升（让我激动或恼怒）。
abrupt
adj. sudden and unexpected, and often unpleasant 突然的；意外的
Our conversation came to an abrupt end when George burst into the room.
乔治突然冲进房间，我们的谈话戛然而止。
provide for
to give someone the things they need, such as money, food, or clothes 为（某人）提供生活所需
He has a wife and two young children to provide for.
他要养活妻子和两个小孩。
devastated
adj. completely destroyed 被彻底摧毁的；毁灭的
very shocked and upset 极度震惊的；极为烦乱的
She was utterly devastated when her husband died.
丈夫死时她整个人都垮掉了。
intrinsic
adj. being an extremely important and basic characteristic of a person or thing 固有的，本质的，根本的
works of little intrinsic value 本身无甚价值的作品
untethered
adj. not physically connected or fastened to something 没连接于……之上的；没被拴住的
Baloons will float skyward if left untethered.
如果不拴住气球，它就会飘向空中。
nourishing
adj. (of food) containing substances necessary for growth, health, and good condition 富有营养的
Sweets aren't very nourishing. 糖果不太有营养。
point fingers/point the finger at someone
to accuse someone of being responsible for something bad that has happened 指责
Unhappy tourists have pointed the finger at unhelpful travel agents.
不满的游客纷纷指责旅行社办事不力。
severance
n. money paid by an employer to an employee whose job the employer has had to bring to an end 遣散费
a severance agreement/package 遣散费协定
n. the act of ending a connection, relationship, etc. or of being separated from a person, place, etc. （联系、关系等的）断绝，中断；分离
The hardest thing to cope with was the severance from his family.
对他来说最难应对的事情是与家人分离。
drain
vt & vi. cause the water or other liquid in (something) to run out, leaving it empty or dry （使）排出，（使）放干
We drained the swimming pool. 我们把游泳池的水放干了。
vt. to make someone very tired 使劳累，使疲惫
The long journey completely drained me. 这次长途旅行可把我累垮了。
今日金句
My job is not a reflection of my worth
我的工作不能代表我的价值
长难句精读
选句
It was only much later, after a lot of reflection, that I was able to recognize that my thought patterns were destructive and untrue.
句子结构
- It was only much later：强调“时间”，意思是“直到很久以后才……”。
- after a lot of reflection：插入的时间/原因背景，“经过大量反思之后”。
- that I was able to recognize：that引导的强调句核心，“我才意识到”。
- that …：宾语从句，说明“意识到的内容是什么”。
语法
- It was … that … 是强调句：
- 作用：把“only much later（很久以后）”这一点强调出来。
- 你可以把它理解成：“正是……我才……”。
- recognize 后面的 that 从句：
- recognize that… = “意识到/认识到……”。
- 这个 that 不是“强调句的 that”，它是“宾语从句的 that”。
精读精讲——单词短语
threshold
n. the level of point at which you start to experience something, or at which something starts to happen 阈值，界限；七点
e.g. I have a low boredom threshold (=i do feel bored easily.)
我很容易感到厌倦。
aerobically
adv. in an aerobic manner: "with oxygen" or relating to processes that require the presence of free oxygen to occur. 有氧地，需氧地
（形容词形式为aerobic）
e.g. When you work out aerobically, your body burns calories (and fat) in three specific ways.
taper
v. (shape or form) to become progressively smaller or narrower at one end.
e.g. The spire of the building tapers to a point.
v. (athletics and training) to gradually reduce the volume or intensity of a workout routine before a major competition (like a marathon) to allow the body to rest.
e.g. Runners typically taper their mileage in the final two weeks before the race day.
v. (finance and economics) a gradual reduction in the amount of stimulus or central bank actions (like quantitative easing) provided to the economy,
e.g. The Federal Reserve’s decision to taper its bond-buying program caused ripples in the stock market.
v. (healthcare) the act of slowly and gradually reducing a medication or dosage rather than stopping abruptly (”cold turkey”) to safely wean the body off it.
e.g. It is important to taper antidepressants to avoid withdrawal symptoms.
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